Weird Tumblr Themes
Super cool chick with a passion for books, movies and cats.

pizza-is-the-key:

reidkun:

quickweaves:

THIS IS THE MOST POWERFUL VINE 

I’m not sure how I didn’t anticipate that

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ugly:


ONE WATERMELON FRESH FROM THE MANURE FIELD YOUR SPOOKYNESS

ugly:

ONE WATERMELON FRESH FROM THE MANURE FIELD YOUR SPOOKYNESS


professorfangirl:


prokopetz:

This is the one time of year that I love wasps.
Not because the wasps themselves get any nicer. They’re horrid little creatures year round. No, it’s because I have a couple of big apple trees out back, and late August, early September is when the apples start ripening.
Now, if you don’t harvest your own fruit, there are two things you need to know about apples.
The first thing you need to know about apples is that, when apples get ripe, they tend to fall from the tree at the slightest breeze.
I often work late at the office; by the time I get home, there are piles of apples scattered everywhere - and sure enough, the wasps are out in force, gorging themselves on the fruit. When I go to clean up the windfallen apples, the wasps naturally do the “rawr, I’ma fuck you up!” routine for which wasps are known.
The second thing you need to know about apples is that they ferment very rapidly in the late August heat.
So: the wasps try to come at me, but they’re too drunk to fly. They get about an inch off the ground, then faceplant directly into the turf, flip over onto their backs, and lay there, legs twitching in the air as they try in vain to find something to sting.
Perhaps I’m a man of simple pleasures, but I bust up laughing every. single. time.
Fucking wasps.

I tried to reblog this with a witty tag, but Tumblr took it as serious advice:

professorfangirl:

prokopetz:

This is the one time of year that I love wasps.

Not because the wasps themselves get any nicer. They’re horrid little creatures year round. No, it’s because I have a couple of big apple trees out back, and late August, early September is when the apples start ripening.

Now, if you don’t harvest your own fruit, there are two things you need to know about apples.

The first thing you need to know about apples is that, when apples get ripe, they tend to fall from the tree at the slightest breeze.

I often work late at the office; by the time I get home, there are piles of apples scattered everywhere - and sure enough, the wasps are out in force, gorging themselves on the fruit. When I go to clean up the windfallen apples, the wasps naturally do the “rawr, I’ma fuck you up!” routine for which wasps are known.

The second thing you need to know about apples is that they ferment very rapidly in the late August heat.

So: the wasps try to come at me, but they’re too drunk to fly. They get about an inch off the ground, then faceplant directly into the turf, flip over onto their backs, and lay there, legs twitching in the air as they try in vain to find something to sting.

Perhaps I’m a man of simple pleasures, but I bust up laughing every. single. time.

Fucking wasps.

I tried to reblog this with a witty tag, but Tumblr took it as serious advice:

image


cotilardmarion:

Viserys Targaryen does the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge

DONATE HERE


fulllblownrose:

It’s too hot *opens window* in comes 20 flies, 8 spiders, 17 daddy long legs, 50 moths, 3 dragons and 12 Jehovah’s witnesses.


Person: "YOU SPEAK ANOTHER LANGUAGE?!"
Me: "Yeah..."
Person: "SAY SOMETHING IN IT!"
Me: -Forgets entire language-

do-i-smell-watermelon:


clesktop:

emmadilemmathethird:

waltdisney-forever:

If only…

Why is the cake cutting-thingy square? And where’s the leftovers from the middle circle?

One of the pieces disappears?????

it’s a mouse wearing pants

do-i-smell-watermelon:

clesktop:

emmadilemmathethird:

waltdisney-forever:

If only…

Why is the cake cutting-thingy square? And where’s the leftovers from the middle circle?

One of the pieces disappears?????

it’s a mouse wearing pants


cartel:

lindsaylohoean:

did anyone ever find out how teen spirit smells

disappointment


pestered:

if someone trusts you enough to tell u a secret please keep it


fadeintocase:

rambling-insanity:

fadeintocase:

I don’t understand how people can shower in like five minutes I mean I can go as fast as I can I still have to shampoo my hair and condition my hair and scrub myself and shave and cut myself shaving and use the blood in my summoning of the dark lord then travel to another dimension to ward off my enemies then come back and dry off how do you do that in five minutes

2 in 1 shampoo/conditioner

FUCK

OF COURSE


graffeti:

me and my brother were fighting and he grabs his phone and randomly calls a number and he says “is this the dog pound? because my sister is the biggest bitch”


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